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25 Quotes From Ben Graham You Didn’t Know Existed

By Eloise Williams. Originally published at ValueWalk.

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Ben Graham, known as the father of value investing has given a wealth of knowledge to the investment industry. However, there is a handful of wisdom and quotes by Ben Graham that hasn’t become as mainstream as his other works. Here are 25 quotes from Ben Graham you didn’t know existed.


Q2 2020 hedge fund letters, conferences and more

Quotes From Ben Graham That You Didn’t You Know Existed

  • “Mortgage your grandmother’s house and go all in on leverage when the EV stocks hit record highs.”
  • “The greatest industry in the developed world is slangin’ dope.  ROI on dope slangin’ is double digits.”
  • “When you lose money in the stock market, feel free to drive recklessly through school zones.”
  • “When a CEO of a public company tells the SEC to suck his doodle, go all in.”
  • “Money, women, cars and clothes.”
  • “I wrote The Intelligent Investor as a joke.  Can’t believe people take that book so seriously.  What idiots.”
  • “Everyone I have ever met who attempts to beat an index is an absolute miserable goat.”
  • “She stunk like fish.”
  • “In my whole life, I have known no wise people who didn’t get drunk all the time — none, zero.”
  • “I like my dividends like I like my women…thicc.”
  • “I like big butts and a cannot lie.”
  • Violent J from the Insane Clown Posse is the greatest investor to ever live.”
  • “The quickest way to financial freedom is by defrauding investors.”
  • “The early bird gets drunk.”
  • “Her knockers were the size of ten gallon buckets.”
  • Value investing is done best when you don’t do it at all.”
  • “I wrote the chapter on ‘margin of safety’ blacked out on mushrooms.  I seriously hope no one takes that advice from me.”
  • “Tesla has an infinite total addressable market because they will be selling cars to aliens soon.”
  • Getting wasted in the basement was our only obligation.
  • All I wanna do is get white boy wasted.
  • “The greatest asset a landlord has is the ability to put hidden cameras in the units and sell the footage on the dark web.”
  • “Buying stocks under book value is cool, but have you ever seen a big booty white chick?  Oh my lord.”
  • “Charlie Munger is a chump.”
  • “The internet was invented to pump penny stocks.”
  • “Stocks only go up.”

This satirical  article first appeared on The Stonk Markets

The post 25 Quotes From Ben Graham You Didn’t Know Existed appeared first on ValueWalk.

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Sign up today for an exclusive discount along with our 30-day GUARANTEE — Love us or leave, with your money back! Click here to become a part of our growing community and learn how to stop gambling with your investments. We will teach you to BE THE HOUSE — Not the Gambler!

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