34 Felony Friday – Will Trump’s New Convictions Change the Vote?

May 31, 2024

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Trump is not a rapist.

I want to clear that up because a lot of people think he was convicted of rape in the E. Jean Carrol case but he was only found guilty of sexual abuse and battery, technically not rape, which is why he has been free to roam around while he stood trial for 34 felony counts of election interference and falsifying documents and engaging in a conspiracy to defraud voters – each of which carries up to 4 years in prison – but we don’t have to worry about that until July 11th.

That gives Trump plenty of time to work on his defense in the Federal Documents Case in Florida, where he faces 40 counts of obstructing justice and mishandling government records. Just like the checks he wrote to Stormy Daniels (he only slept with her, it wasn’t rape – let’s not call Trump a rapist) to keep her silent about their tryst (the nicest word) which he took out of his campaign fund (thank you for your donations), Trump is very clearly guilty of hiding documents and that is borderline treason but not Treason.

His 4 counts of election interference relating to the January 4th riots where 4 people died and hundreds were injured won’t be heard until March 4, 2025 and maybe Trump will be President again so he can pardon himself – won’t that be great?

Not to be confused with his attempts to overturn the election on January 4th, 2021, we also have Trump’s racketeering case from his November 2020 attempts to overturn Georgia’s election results ahead of us. But at least he’s technically not a rapist, right?

Who will be President 6 months from now is a very big deal for the economy and the markets but it’s still going to be a close call. Apparently, if Trump does win – Biden will be allowed to have his people storm the capital and prevent the election results from being certified and Trump’s lawyers are even arguing in the Supreme Court that President Biden could have Trump assassinated if he wishes – with complete immunity from prosecution – so the whole thing is very tricky to call.

Other than the raping – it was ONLY Sexual Abuse and Battery because Trump only forced his fingers into Carroll’s vagina – NOT his penis – so NOT rape, only sexual assault – you can still proudly defend Donald Trump as not technically being a rapist and don’t let those liberals tell you otherwise! In fact, both the other women who testified that Trump also assaulted them ALSO said it was just forcible fingering or “grabbing them by the pussy” as Trump likes to say – not rape – and that is consistent with the 24 other women who have come forward to say Trump sexually harassed them over the years.

And you know that is true because, according to Stormy Daniels (who is quite the expert) and other women he’s slept with, Trump has what is technically referred to as a microphallus – a very small, short, stubby penis that he simply can’t penetrate a woman with – not without quite a lot of cooperation on her part – tell that to those Libtards who dare to call him a rapist – it’s physically impossible!

This is how women voters decided the 2020 election So now we have the ammunition we need to defend Donald Trump over the weekend as Liberals rejoice in his criminal convictions. Stand strong men, don’t think about how this affects your wives or your daughters – stand by your man! And to you women – well, who cares what you think – right boys?!?

As long as we can keep women from voting – Trump has a good chance to win in November – if the popular vote even matters, that is…

8:30 Update: Back to the markets! PCE Prices were up 0.3% – same as March but leading Economorons thought they’d be down to 0.2% so hotter than expected. Personal Income slowed from 0.5% to 0.3% and Personal Spending, as we’ve been hearing from many CEOs this Q, has crashed from 0.7% to 0.2% – just 2.4% annualized – yikes!

Fortunately, bad news is good news for the market as a depressed consumer (this is where the word “Depression” comes from) is HOPEFULLY going to push the Fed to lower rates sooner rather than later but this is all just the same Stagflation we’ve been discussing all week – inflation is still higher than the Fed wants and they WANT consumer spending to slow down to alleviate pressure on prices.

Not only that but, CLEARLY, from our recent note auctions, the current 5.25% Fed Funds rate is NOT enough to attract bidders for our debt and the Fed can’t dictate those auctions if they are not willing to build their balance sheet back to $10Tn and higher – it’s kind of a no-win scenario for the Fed.