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How to Stay Awake During Obama Speeches: Play Bullshit Bingo

How to Stay Awake During Obama Speeches: Play Bullshit Bingo

Manual bingo machine, low angle view

Via e-mail to Yves Smith, posted at Naked Capitalism:

1. Before Barrack Obama’s next televised speech, prepare your “Bullshit Bingo” card by drawing a square.  I find that 5″ x 5″ is a good size — and dividing it into columns –five across and five down. That will give you 25 1-inch blocks.  

2. Write one of the following words/phrases in each block: 

Restored our reputation 
Strategic fit
Let me be clear 
Make no mistake
Back from the brink
Signs of recovery 
Out of the loop
Benchmark
Job creation

People playing bingo

Fiscal restraint
Win-win
Affordable health care 
Previous Administration
At the end of the day
Empower (or empowerment) 
Touch base 
Mindset 
Bipartisan
Trust
Inherited as in “I inherited this mess”
Relief for working families
Unprecedented
Accountable (or held to account)
Free market
Reform

 

Players can make substitutions to this list, but only one phrase can be used in any one block. Alternatives include:

Change (as in “change you can believe in)
Universal health care
Brought the economy back from the brink

3. Check off the appropriate block when you hear one of those words/phrases. 

4. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally, stand up and shout  ”BULLSHIT!”

Testimonials from past satisfied “Bullshit Bingo” players: 

Three young women raising their hands on a winners podium


 ”I had been listening to the speech for only five minutes when I won.” - Jack W., Boston 

 ”My attention span during speeches has improved dramatically.” – David D., Florida 

 ”What a gas! Speeches will never be the same for me after my first win.” - Bill R., New York City  

“The atmosphere was tense in the last speech as 14 of us waited for the fifth box.” – Ben G., Denver  

“The speaker was stunned as eight of us screamed “BULLSHIT!” for the third time in two hours.” – Harry A. Chantilly


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  1. Indeed. What bothers me in this last speech on Trade Issues is that the Administration’s answer is to "Form a Committee" and this clearly shows he doesn’t know what he is doing. Chile for instance just elected a reponsible non-socialist, we ought to be "all-in" with Chile right now, especially after their Earthquake. Meanwhile, while he talks trade, we are getting bent over by the Chinese, Brazil, and other nations. I did catch this email going around on the Bingo Game, and yes, I laughed. But only for a moment before I signed up for the local "Teleprompter" University Class, because I want to make BIG Speeches and be a BIG MAN too! Yippeee! and get a Nobel Prize for doing so! Toastmasters HERE I COME!!!


  2.  I think you just need more financial backing, perhaps, but I wish you GOOD LUCK and will vote for you if you run for something!